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the truth about biology and ugly girls 22 October, 2006

Posted by silentpyjamas in blather and claptrap, inflammatory!.

[13:56] <spj_zeez> i wonder if it is the fate of women everywhere to believe they are ugly
[13:57] <TheFool> well, duh…if they didn’t, how would the vast majority of men get to breed?
[13:57] <spj_zeez> lol what do you mean?
[13:57] <@Lance> if it answers your inquery, I haven’t met a woman yet that’s stated she’s comfortable enough with her appearance to make out with their reflections
[13:57] <spj_zeez> i’d think it would be more helpful if women thought they were beautiful, as the proclivity tends toward the best possible specimens
[13:57] <TheFool> well, if women believed they were beautiful, then they’d have standards
[13:58] <TheFool> and then most guys wouldn’t be able to breed
[13:58] <TheFool> therefore it’s in their best interests to make women feel ugly
[13:59] <spj_zeez> hrm i guess that makes as much sense as anything else i’ve heard
[14:02] <spj_zeez> the thing is. actual ugly girls then feel even uglier. because if pretty girls are ugly then like, less-than-pretty girls are hopeless and hideous
[14:02] <spj_zeez> so it is still not really a level playing field
[14:02] * spj_zeez has given this a lot of thought
[14:04] <TheFool> no, but those hopeless and hideous girls are likelier to spread for any guy who shows an interest
[14:04] <TheFool> and therefore more likely to have kids
[14:05] <spj_zeez> yes i have considered that
[14:05] <spj_zeez> i suppose it is a natural and biological order
[14:06] <spj_zeez> heheh
[14:06] <spj_zeez> nature wins again
[14:07] <spj_zeez> i see. it all makes sense now. i feel encouraged

i didn’t really address ugly guys, not having ever been one before. the topic did come up but it was less scientific and more comical when we talked about it. at last, hyoo-mons, we have figured it out. we think we have triumphed over nature what with our “thinking” and our “minds” and our “free will” but we now know that, in fact, nature has defeated us once again. you can’t really argue with logic like TheFool’s because he has no interest whatsoever in romance with girls or guys, and is frankly turned off by the thought.

this means, clearly, that he is impartial and thinks about this kind of stuff in a way most of us in the repro-race do not. what does the whole thing say about people? i don’t know, except that in the end with very few exceptions, we are herded just like the so-called lesser animals. seems we’re just as “lesser” as they are. on the plus side i am relatively encouraged that all i need to do is behave according to my station and in the end i will be rewarded. there is a heaven for ugly girls!

i think i spent too much time on my youth not putting out. this is where i failed. had i been doing it up to now, i’d probably engender the kind of loyalty that ugly girls get when they bang a guy who turns out to like them. by then, they’ve already passed the most important tests. i’ve been going the wrong route, being all on the high road, can’t sleep with someone until we have a relationship, shot down in pretty girls’ territory.

i will use my newfound wisdom, well, wisely. cheer up, ugly girls. we can’t be as picky as the pretty ones, but we’re the ones who keep the place populated.



1. jobey - 9 November, 2006

you probably aren’t ugly. don’t be so hard on yourself. even if you dont consider yourself the best looking… there are tons of guys out there… do you think all of them are drop dead gorgeous…nuh uh…
p.s. play hard to get a little, be confident, make a little effort and the boys will looooove you

2. Lelan - 6 June, 2007

I’m a guy and think you girls have got it almost right. Don’t put out when you are young. Save it for that special guy you have serious feelings about. You may have heard all of this before, but you will have a lasting relationship, maybe. To me there are three kinds of guys in the world. The religious ones who want a family and responsibilities. They have jobs, money and are as dumb about girls as you are about guys. If you let them have you before marriage, you are hurting both of your relationships. It is kinda in the mind that you cheated on a Biblical act and messed up the relationship with God and your success being married.

The second kinda guy just wants to get off inside of you. You are like a toilet, and he needs a woman to release, rather than do it manually himself or let another guy help him in the secrecy of home or a park.

The third kinda guy is a “loser” type of personality. You might be attracted to him because you think you can fix him. You think you can make him ambitious and responsible and loving, etc. You are wrong. No one can fix anybody, …the fixing comes from within. When you take pity on a person, they know it is not love. They think you are stupid, but will never tell you. They think anyone who goes to work is stupid. They know that “all the weak people” will take care of them. So they do nothing and act “pitiful” for you, and do a great job. They will have sex with you and help YOU to have more children, (this guy is a child too! mentally that is.)

Women, you are all beautiful and sexy to every man that walks the street. Most men will not admit they “like” you, because of peer pressure. The media and highschool games teach young boys to like certain shapes and sizes. If you look at beautiful women of other countries in the east, you will find that overweight women are considered attractive and desirable. Mostly because they can do more work, are in a better state of mind (here too) and simply want to make out and have a family with respect.

In America, the same truths hold up, we just do not acknowledge them, as guys. I have met many women who do not fit the definition of Vogue magazine as pretty, cute, attractive. But they, the authors of these types of magazines do not tell me who to sleep with, who to marry, who to play with. I decide.

The thin little bodies that are printed on front covers of magazines look like sick, underfed people who need to eat a few meals and see a doctor. Ask any doctor of health what their assessment is on the appearance of these women on those front covers.

Personally, I look beyond the physical appearance of a woman. Why? Because, it is their mouth I have to live with. Think about. Under the covers I would be able to tell you it is a slightly over weight person to an almost to heavy woman just through the senses of intercourse. The sex act is only a couple of hours for me (I hear I am a luck s.o.b.) and there are over 9 hours left in the day to speak to my woman. The ratio is 2:9 for me, for others it might be .1:9 (ten minutes of sex : 9 hours of talk time)

If I cannot handle the talk time, the relationship will fail, regardless of the sex.

Summary, learn to “communicate” with your man of choice, and he will take you as his woman for life. Give him good sex, by asking what he likes and do what he likes. If you don’t like what you have to do, find another Mr. Right for you. If you like what you need to do to keep your man happy, do as often as he can stand it. Be creative, spontaneous like , you are going to a restaurant, and surprise him, and tell him you could “do that thing he likes” in the car, or at a motel before you dine.

Pretend, that you are still dating, everyday. Keep your relationship fresh, and assume nothing and take nothing for granted. If you spend 1 hour to beauty up today, each year add a couple of minutes. Keep you looks up, what ever you have, and work it. Your man will love “that thing you do” and the effort you put behind it. For him, that’s love. Understanding that you should keep your mouth shut during a game or movie goes a long way. Men need quiet time. Just say nothing and pretend that you are trying not to bother him. He will notice, and love you more for it. And often he will be forced to grab you and hug you, kiss you, and whisper sweet nothings in your ear!

3. Bob - 22 July, 2007

That was really bad advice. Seriously. If you’re an ugly girl don’t play hard to get unless you’re aiming to seduce a blind guy. My friends and I always laugh whenever and ugly chick tries to play just as hard to get as the most gorgeous woman in town. It’s absurd we’re just like “Yeah, right. Who do you think you are? ?” Playing hard to get is just irritating to men, regardless of beauty, but for for ugly girls it’s just unacceptable and FYI no one is going to tolerate it.

My advice is to continue to take care of yourself, just because you are pretty doesn’t mean you should give up on having good hygiene. I’ve seen this happen…and also try to play up your other strengths such as intelligence or sense of humor, but only if you have those too!

4. Bob - 22 July, 2007

Also that stuff about the media and peer pressure teaching boys what sort of girls they should be attracted to is bull shit. The consensus among every guy I know is that attractive = blond blue eyes short with big boobs.

I like small boobs, long dark hair, dark eyes and I prefer women who are taller than me. Some of friends said my last GF was freakishly tall or manish but I can’t imagine evr being attracted to a short droopy-titted blond.

5. donna - 23 August, 2007

i am not a very cute women but i’m very carring i love very
deeply- and know how to please a man i have learned from
my mis-takes! also i am a good listerner-and love funny things
but i am so–oo lonely men look over me i need to loose weight but i eat to fill the viod

6. lily - 22 October, 2007

I think the problem with men is that they look at women as parts and they are so conditioned by society to like a skinny, big boobeb girl……………and this for me makes men so unattractive to me because it is so one dimensional and flat……sexuality and sensuality is all about contradiction…you will see a woman where maybe you cand tear a part her parts per se but all together there is somethin so sexy and sensual about her. I love a guy who can look past the hype and think for themselves and find a engaging woman who part by part might not be perfect……………I think those women with fake boobs and flat asses are really so unattractive because they are so flat……and all these shows you watch on vh1 and channel e like dr. 90210 or sunset tan etc……I can’t find ANYthing attractive about the people on there because they are trying so hard to be perfect that they lose their persoanlity and individualism

7. Sindhu - 1 November, 2007

Im yet to find a guy who loves me for who I am rather than how I look. It seems, Im smart, witty. That makes me good enough to be their best friend. Im a little overweight. That makes me not worth their affections. Yeah, our relationship is perfect, its just that im not physically attracted to you. If not for that, you are my dream girl. I had this told to me. Not the msot comforting thought. Makes one yearn to be pretty.

8. silentpyjamas - 1 November, 2007

i never expected to have so many responses to this post. i have yet to get a response from a beautiful woman with her side of the story but i do appreciate that men have chimed in. not that it was anything i cared to hear but i’m sure any pretty ladies who have tuned in appreciate knowing they rule the school.

to all the women who have posted, thank you. i’m sorry that you feel unattractive. i do too and i have no way of figuring out how to get over that. i think in the end what happens is nothing, and things stay as they have always been. the less attractive women will find someone who perhaps they wouldn’t have chosen for themselves but no starving person will complain that they got a sandwich instead of a steak. the ones who can afford to pick and choose will, and the leavings of that choice are still too good for us. there are occasional exceptions (i know a swell guy who seems to be blind to ugliness) but that is luck. for the most part there is none of that.

maybe someday as biology goes on one day everyone will look the same or very close to it. then the personality and character will matter. until then good luck to every un-pretty girl in finding someone who can see past what society tells them is paramount.

9. DWI - 2 December, 2007

I say, “just put out”. If your an ugly chick just give head”. If your fat, “just give head.” If your hot just bend over n take it like a slut. Any chick that thinks she’ll b beautiful forever is kidding themselves. You all get ugly after 28-29. Then you hide your fat, stretch marks, wrinkles, or whatever drug your body is not prone to that makes you ugly. All I’m sayin is most chicks think they’re better lookin than they really are. N they need to put out or just get fat n stay in the house alone cause either way your no use. Just my opinion on life. Nite.

10. Tom - 19 December, 2007

. As a man who is fortunate to have been engaged to a truly beautiful woman ( magazine cover beautiful ), I can tell you it isn’t all its cracked up to be. It was lots of fun to be the “beautiful couple” wherever we went, but it sucked that even my best friends weren’t shy in telling me how much they would love to “do” her. They meant it too, some of them really tried behind my back. Anyway….
We both decided that I should go back to school before we got married. No big deal as it was only 2 years, but it involved a move to another state. Because we had been together for 3 years, we thought we could handle it. We moved and suddenly it was just us – no friends and very little money. Times got tough and she split after 4+ years together because she “wasn’t happy”. I cannot blame her, she had a world of aggressive, handsome, rich, successful men to choose from vs. me with no money or time for her as I was working 48 hours a week and going to school full time. Two years of having no fun was apparently her limit.
So here I was broke and alone in New Jersey at the age of 30 with my new degree and a piece of crap car I bought for $750. It took me one year to find a job. At that job a met a woman who was easily twice my size. We became fast friends but I would have nothing more. She was full of stories about guys saying such thing as “You’re much more fun than my girlfriend.”. I could understand why.
Over the next couple years I dated a few cute women but nothing lasting more than a couple months at a time. I don’t know what made me change my mind about my robust best friend, but I am sure glad I did. Do you have any idea how much grief I got for dating her? It sucked so bad I almost couldn’t take it but she made me so happy I learned to ignore the comments.
We have been together 6+ years, 2 years of which she spent taking care of me while I was recovering from emergency surgery. She didn’t run when the sh!t hit the fan, and more than that she is the most wonderful person I have ever met in my entire life. we would do anything for each other and we have discovered being truly happy with someone ripples throughout your life. She has lost a great deal of weight through years of exercise and for some reason her skin cleared up (she had really bad skin). She is 35+ without a wrinkle and gets carded on a regular basis. As a result she has gained a great deal of confidence. I feel loved and supported and have likewise gotten back to health with her as my career has taken off. She treats me like a king, and once again I find myself half of a pair being treated like the “beautiful couple” wherever we go. Those same people who were making comments before ain’t saying sh!t now.

hey - 3 June, 2011

Why didn’t you marry her. Bu you wanted to marry your first beautiful girlfriend but she left you. And I hope this one does to six years and no mariage what a waste.

11. kpli - 28 December, 2007

i think it is funny but sensitive …hmm..i think people do have personality weakness, just don’t bother what people says

12. Music Lover - 28 February, 2008

It’s very difficult to grow up in this society as a woman who is not seen as widly attractive by men. To be honest with you, there are some men out there who are very different but from the internet and everyday life, you wouldn’t think it. Most men are very ignorant about women and for some reason place a high value on the way a woman looks (this includes men who are not particularly attractive – actually I find that it’s the less attractive men who are so very focused on looks, possibly because they have such a genetic need, and I would say that the average guy in the street is about a ‘4’ compared to the average or “ugly” girl – I am putting my ‘2008 shallow hat’ on and looking through the media’s eyes to say this btw). I look forward to the day when men choose a partner in the way women do. If women chose men the way men choose women, I very much doubt many men would be in any kind of relationship whatsoever. I think that the only way a man will be forced to change his mind about this is either through a developed appreciation of beauty (yeh right) or through women becoming equally as physically shallow as men so that the majority of men will be osctracised enough to have to question this kind of shallowness.

“for for ugly girls it’s just unacceptable and FYI no one is going to tolerate it.”

This is ridiculous. Men do not call the shots or dictate what is acceptable and unnaceptable from how an ‘ugly’ woman (or any woman) behaves and I think it’s a very sad state of affairs if any woman goes through life looking at it from a man’s perspective. Don’t let men tell you what to do. You cannot encourage stupidity in men and you shouldn’t. I think it’s probably much better to be single forever than to ‘settle’ or to marry a man who will be a poor role model for your children/breed and condition more of his own kind. What can this kind of man offer you?

I will also say that men have very strange ideas about beauty which are not honest or reflective of beauty itself (and by this I also mean ‘physical’ beauty). Their appreciation is very limited and they confuse ‘not standing out’ or ‘not fitting into the mould’ with ‘ugliness’. If you look in the mirror and you ignore the media’s idea of beauty and you ignore what these men say and you can say ‘actually I have a nice smile’ or ‘nice eyes’ then you can appreciate beauty within yourself. If you can’t see beauty when you look at yourself physically then the problem lies with your appreciation of yourself rather than other people.

If men think you’re ugly it doesn’t mean that you ARE. Guys tend to treat ‘beauty’ as facts – she IS ugly or she IS hot. It is very child like. It’s funny how so many people fall for it. Even a man who as he grows older develops his mind a little more and says ‘it’s not all about looks’ still has these funny ideas about beauty. ‘truth’ is entirely subjective so if a woman or man thinks he/she is attractive but 50 pre-conditioned people say ‘no’ that doesn’t mean that the 50 people are right or wrong. it doesn’t mean you are right or wrong. It’s only about what you/they are willing to appreciate (most people are impatient with looks so they expect an immediate impression) and what you/they have been told to appreciate. This is still a society in great development and please remember that. We are not seeing humankind at its most developed, far from it so please don’t lower yourself to the standard of how people behave today. If you live in America then I think things are 100 times worse when it comes to shallowness. Travel around a bit and you will see that men are a little more developed elsewhere.

I mean no disrespect but I view men as akin to animals when it comes to choosing a mate – it is not about ‘what is best for society’ or ‘what is best for humankind’ for them but ‘what looks good’ and they seem to take the physical as a representation of deeper things (beauty=intelligence etc.) which is astonishingly ignorant. They will not change in the short term (this will probably take centuries of reconditioning) so you need to change both your respect for this kind of man no matter if it’s the majority (why do you value people who walk through life blindly?) – not with bitterness but just accept and know that he is limited in his perspective – and then grow in appreciation of yourself, both physically and in a much deeper manner.

Good luck. x

13. Sadgirl - 27 March, 2008

i don’t want to be blond, blue-eyed, tall, and toothpick-shaped, but i still feel hideous as a hairy, short, overweight, acne-ridden teen(whose parents don’t allow her to wear makeup!) and i always feel that the guys i like won’t care for my brain/personality because i’m just so UGLYYYYYYY!! 😦

14. Sadgirl - 27 March, 2008

and, as dorothy parker said, men seldom make passes at girls who wear glasses…. 8-S

15. music lover - 9 April, 2008

No, I wear glasses and men DO make passes. Remember, not every man is a shallow loser. You should expect more from a man and only go out with a worthy and deserving and MATURE man. Aim higher.

16. mk - 10 May, 2008

I think that women are lower standards than men. A man with acne and one who is not “good looking” will still aim for a girl that is pretty okay looking (from what I have observed) and an “ugly” girl with acne and maybe a weight problem will aim for any guy. This is what I have observed and I really think this is wrong because only the pretty girls get all the men. All the men like those select few pretty girls so I think girls need to start moving their standard higher to match the boys so the boys can realize that what they do is wrong. Females are stronger than men so they should atleast have EQUAL if not more, standards.

17. mk - 10 May, 2008

women have* lower standards than men, that’s what I meant sorry.

18. Lene - 16 June, 2008

Tell me about having low self esteem! So what do you guys think of plastic surgery? I’ve considered having my nose done for years, because – tragically -no one’s ever told me anything good about my looks (not even my freaking mom)! I’m nervous about it, but I don’t see any other way out – I’ve got the money, so you’d think I’d gain more respect when I go out, if I’ll do the surgery? Please answer…

19. Joy - 2 August, 2008

yes if u don’t tell if u do tell pple will judge u an avoid u at all times!

20. Megan - 5 August, 2008

brooke rishhhh needs to be on here.

21. jenny - 12 January, 2009

if you want to get a nose job you should! There’s nothing wrong with it as long as you don’t make the mistake of thinking that it’s going to solve all of your issues. But if you think it will make a difference in the way you feel about yourself go for it!!!

Good luck

22. Maria - 8 March, 2009

Oh blaaaah.
To tell you the truth, I always considered myself unattractive or average at best. I’ve had two boyfriends and I’m 20 right now. Both of them, one of which I am currently dating, are very attractive men. They’re THOSE guys in the friend groups that everyone sees as the cute ones. Somehow, I bagged them.
For some reason when I get into a relationship I tend to feel extremely self-critical and antsy. When they’re just friends I’m confident enough to hold long conversations, treat myself with respect and feel good, but as soon as I start dating them it becomes this race to be beautiful in my mind. This ruined my last relationship because my then boyfriend felt as if I had changed. When he asked me out I was confident and happy, and afterwards it was like he was constantly reassuring me of my value.
Ladies, it’s so cliche but so true. Men like girls who are confident in themselves regardless of how they look. Take care of yourself as best as you can, because your body is a temple and all that, but remember that ultimately it really is who you are that counts.
Take it from the 5 who gets with the 10s.

23. Becky - 30 March, 2011

As someone who has three ticks in what every guy wants list,
Blonde- yes
Blue eyed-yes
It’s really not all its cracked up to be! I often find guys are either too afraid to approach you or the moment they notice you actually have a brain (being a top set high achiever) they freak out and think you’re strange for not being a dumb bimbo!
As well as that you’re not allowed to be funny, often ill say something and no one laughs but if my brunette friend says it everyone laughs even though I said it two seconds before! I mean I’m incredibly critical of myself because all my other friends are all hooking up and going places with their partners not me I’m just left on the shelf will people telling me they don’t know why I’m still single! I’m what everyone should consider to be the “dream girl” but I have still to be treated as such so don’t go blaming so called “attractive girls” because to be honest were having as much a hard time as you.

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