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sci fi paranoia night 12 June, 2006

Posted by silentpyjamas in 420 posts, blather and claptrap, chronicle of the crazy.
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okay, a couple of things.

first: i swear there is some kind of alien sitting on the outside sill of the high window in my mom's livingroom.  okay?

second: i was just out in the coutyard getting whanged and i heard this terrible and sudden noise.  now listen, okay?  it's like 2:45 am in las vegas and i am in my mom's courtyard getting high.  i used her barbecue lighter (but not the bendy one) because i had mistakenly grabbed from my house a nearly-deceased lighter.  this made for a really tragic smoking time.  i had to go out to smoke, come back in to find a new lighter.  every noise i made seemed so loud.  and then of course on the way to the kitchen i see this alien thing and then i get back to the yard and i notice…a solar light where there appeard to be NOT A SOLAR LIGHT BEFORE!  (side note: i know the guy whose grandfather invented malibu lights.  i mention this because i said "mom, don't buy those lame solar lights.  you should be awesome and get malibu lights instead.  i know the guy whose grandfather invented them.")  so i am already freaked out.

okay i know my style is disjointed so let me fix this for you.

a) alien

b) already freaked out by solar light and the alien and HIGH , i hear a loud roaring noise.  i look to my left and see the air-conditioner and i had no idea what it was!  i felt this dumb panic.  for seriously, i thought i was going to die.  i was in my mom's backyard staring at the air conditioner thing like it was about to turn into a giant robot and obliterate me.  it was so crazy. 

 now, what number was i on?

(scrolls back)  or right.  count-y-thing.

 third: i am also totally hallucinating hardcore.  now this may sound like just the kind of blather and claptrap i am always saying.  but it's absolutely not.  neither is it stuff and nonsense so don't ask.  i am absolutely and totally hearing noises from my left.  no, not in my left ear, from my left.  i have no idea what these noises are.  they sound like conversations.  i would like to listen more closely but the thing is at this moment i cannot be fooled.  there is nobody to my left.  my niece is asleep in the guest room.  the tv is on in here but the sound is off.  that is so crazy.

 wow now my sister is home and telling me about her crazy adventures with her husband.  don't ask.  i think they are both retarded.

someone help me.  they're all sucking my brains out.  maybe that's what that alien on the front patio is about.

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